There are 3 things for certain in life - death, taxes, and Dale Peterson.
New Dale Facts added May 27, 2010!
The legend of Dale Peterson continues to grow. Many new facts have been submitted to us in the past few days and added to our list. Have a Dale Peterson fact that is not listed? Send us a tip and we'll get it added to the list!
Dale Peterson Fact #40
The chicken crossed the road to avoid Dale Peterson.
All the Dale Peterson Facts. Betcha Didn't Know That.
The legend continues! Get all the Dale Peterson facts as submitted by our visitors. Have a Dale Peterson fact not listed below? Send us an e-mail!
Dale Peterson Fact #42
Dale Peterson Fact #48
Dale Peterson doesn't give a RIP if you're feeling lucky, punk.
Dale Peterson Fact #49
Kentucky Derby Thoroughbreds envy Dale Peterson's horse.
Dale Peterson Fact #37
Dale Peterson once shot a man in Reno just to watch him die... with a potato gun.
Dale Peterson Fact #45
Sarah Palin's husband, Todd, has only lost one snowmobile race
and that was to Dale Peterson.
Dale Peterson Fact #35
Joe the Plumber doesn't have a job anymore
because when Dale Peterson fixes a pipe, it never breaks again.
Dale Peterson Fact #34
Dale Peterson's running mates are Smith and Wesson.
Dale Peterson Fact #47
Dale Peterson does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure.
Dale Peterson goes killing.
Dale Peterson Fact #44
The boogeyman checks in his closet for Dale Peterson at night.
Dale Peterson Fact #41
Dale Peterson's calendar skips April 1st - there's no foolin' Dale Peterson!
Dale Peterson Fact #33
Dale Peterson means business.
Dale Peterson Fact #32
Evolution doesn't exist because it ended with Dale Peterson.
Dale Peterson Fact #30
Dale Peterson is never wrong. Wrong wishes it were Dale Peterson.
Dale Peterson Fact #12
Jack Bauer needs 24 hours. Dale Peterson only needs 12.
Dale Peterson Fact #6
In Alabama, tornadoes are called Dales.
Dale Peterson Fact #38
Dale Peterson craps Democrats.
Dale Peterson Fact #36
Dale Peterson is renewable energy. Problem solved.
Dale Peterson Fact #9
Barack Obama was going to nominate Dale Peterson to the Supreme Court,
but then what would the other 8 Justices do?
Dale Peterson Fact #15
When Dale Peterson slices an onion, the onion cries.
Dale Peterson Fact #29
Dale Peterson didn't join the Republican Party,
the Republican Party joined Dale Peterson.
Dale Peterson Fact #23
Dale Peterson has never cried. His eyes just leak drops of justice.
Dale Peterson Fact #2
Superman wears Dale Peterson pajamas.
Dale Peterson Fact #24
Before Chuck Norris goes to sleep...
he checks under his bed for Dale Peterson.
Dale Peterson Fact #21
When 911 responders get in trouble, they call Dale Peterson.
Dale Peterson Fact #17
Dale Peterson doesn't dodge bullets.
Bullets dodge Dale Peterson.
Dale Peterson Fact #13
Kryptonite can kill Superman. Dale Peterson can kill kryptonite.
Dale Peterson Fact #11
Dale Peterson can kill two stones with one bird.
Dale Peterson Fact #40
The chicken crossed the road to avoid Dale Peterson.
Dale Peterson Fact #14
The only reason you are still conscious
is because Dale Peterson doesn't want to carry you.
Dale Peterson Fact #1
Dale Peterson is no dummy.
Dale Peterson Fact #31
If Dale Peterson were a woman he'd still be a man.
Dale Peterson Fact #27
Some people call him Super Dale.
Dale Peterson Fact #18
Dale Peterson doesn't cut the grass,
he stares at it and dares it to grow.
Dale Peterson Fact #8
Dale Peterson doesn't "speak softly and carry a big stick,"
he carries a big gun and he says whatever the hell he wants.
Dale Peterson Fact #20
It's no use crying over spilt milk...
Unless it was Dale Peterson's milk.
Then you are screwed.
Dale Peterson Fact #7
When Dale Peterson does push ups, the earth moves.
Dale Peterson Fact #16
The University of Alabama is considering changing their mascot.
Dale Peterson sounds more fierce than the Crimson Tide.
Dale Peterson Fact #28
Dale Peterson will name names and takes no prisoners.
Dale Peterson Fact #5
Dale Peterson is the next American Idol.
Dale Peterson Fact #19
Dale Peterson once blocked a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick.
Then he killed Chuck Norris with his bare hands.
Dale Peterson Fact #4
Dale Peterson taught Jack Bauer everything he knows.
Dale Peterson Fact #50
Dale Peterson can stop the BP Oil spill,
he'll scare all of the oil back into the pipe.
Dale Peterson Fact #10
Dale Peterson will never apologize for America.
Dale Peterson Fact #3
Dale Peterson clings to his gun and Bible,
and he dares you to take them away.
Dale Peterson Fact #22
Vote for Dale Peterson, or else...
Dale Peterson Fact #26
In Alabama, SWAT Teams are called Dale Peterson.
They scare thugs and criminals into submission.
Dale Peterson Fact #39
All of the wind turbines in the United States can be powered for a full year
by one Dale Peterson sneeze.
Dale Peterson Fact #43
Arizona doesn't need a law to stop Illegal Immigration,
they just need Dale Peterson to visit.
Dale Peterson Fact #25
Even Dale Jr. fans know the real Dale when they see him.
DalePetersonFacts.com Is Not Associated with Any Political Campaign
We don't know Dale Peterson. We don't live in Alabama, so we can't even vote for Dale Peterson. Dale Peterson has nothing to do with this website. Neither does his campaign, his political opponent nor any political party. This website is strictly a parody website inspired by Dale Peterson's kickass campaign commercial for Agriculture Commissioner of Alabama. Based on that alone we believe Dale Peterson can single-handedly save the world, kick liberal ass and stop the corrupt politicians and Progressives from destroying our great nation. As such, we encourage Dale Peterson to forgo Alabama politics and take his rightful place in the Oval Office.
As seen in the Washington Post
A parody site sponsored by AmericanElephant.com, in cooperation with Maxwell Sydney Design Group.
